You're Gonna Serve Hard Time, Punk! ~ Big Bossman, 1988

There was a time when celebrities getting arrested were something of shock value. Nowadays it's a common thing to see celebrities with mug shots. From Michael Jackson to Snoop Dogg, you can almost always expect to see a celebrity in trouble with the law. I mean after all, they are still human and subject to mistakes.

But unlike most people, celebrities seem to think they are above the law and/or deserve some sort of special treatment. This brings me to America's No. 1 bad girl, the centerpiece of the Hilton Dynasty (and of my video collection), Paris Hilton. Paris was serving 36 months of probation after pleading no contest to a charge of alcohol-related reckless driving related to her Sept. 7 arrest in Hollywood. She also had been fined $1,500 and had her license suspended for a couple of months.

But what did she do? She went about her way choosing to ignore her previous plea agreement and continued to drive. Now she has been sentenced 45 days in jail, and she's about to have a nervous breakdown. GIVE ME A BREAK! I served in law enforcement for five years down in Jacksonville, Fla., and I can tell you firsthand that Paris Hilton is still getting off easy!

She violated probation! Usually this means that you'll be sentenced to almost the maximum penalty that warrants the crime. Forty five days in the slammer? Puh-leese!! I mean, she might as well document this upcoming journey behind bars, because with the trend that has been set by other stars that have been arrested, she's only gonna come out of this whole ordeal richer, more famous and more popular than before.

What is it with all of these celebrities? Do these celebrities not care about their adoring public or the millions of kids that look up to them like I do? Look at what happened with Bobby Lashley on ECW on Sci-Fi? This guy blatantly disregarded the officers onhand to fulfill his own personal will on some poor guy in a wheelchair. Much to Lashley's credit, he willingly went to jail and took his punishment like a champ…or former champ! It's a good thing YOUR Paragon of Virtue wasn't one of the cops that evening because Lashley would have received (and in the near future will) an experience that he'd never forget!

For some, being incarcerated is not an easy thing. (Just ask Balls Mahoney. The ring attire he's worn since the original ECW has held him captive for years.) When you're incarcerated, it's no more lifestyle of the rich and famous; it's the simple life, which is why little Paris is terrified! Some people lose it when they are in the slammer. Some fear for their life, while others just turn into PUNKS!

This reminds me of one so called straight-edged punk, Charles Montgomery. I personally don't understand why CM Punk has brought shame and disgrace to the cult phenomenon that is straightedge. There is nothing straightedge about CM Punk, and everyone will soon know that when I shine my guiding light on him and expose him for what he is. CM Punk is a liar, a cheat and a backstabber. For Charles Montgomery's sake, here's to hoping he's never faced with this Paris Hilton situation. I mean, what guy wouldn't want a PUNK as his or "her" cellmate?

I'm familiar with the straightedge lifestyle. I know that straightedge is about honor and respect -- something that CM Punk knows nothing about. Punk attempted to destroy my home, my family, MY New Breed. That's why I had my personal enforcer, Marcus Cor Von, teach Punk a lesson about pain and suffering as he pounced the punk all over the ring. But I can assure you someone will be serving hard time because come May 20 at Judgment Day, I will be the judge, jury and executioner for Charles Montgomery Punk!

Questions, comments and/or concerns? Reach out to your Paragon of Virtue at ECWHOH@yahoo.com and go Face 2 Face next week as your questions are answered in this very column!