'Total Divas' Season 3, Episodes 8 & 9 recap: Movin' out
While one happy couple approaches their big day on E!’s “Total Divas,” another careens toward the D-word over the course of the show’s second double episode in as many weeks.
Happily, Part 1 is a mostly lighthearted affair, highlighted by Eva Marie’s zany road trip to California with Cameron, Jonathan and Vinny. On paper, this should be a breeze, but Eva — who’s lackadaisical at best — and Jonathan — fastidious to a fault — butt heads when her laid-back attitude throws his meticulously planned itinerary (folders for everybody!) into disarray. That, in turn, spreads to Cameron and Vinny, and soon everybody’s fighting in some form or another. Eva makes the call to cut everyone’s losses and abandon the road trip midstream, which summarily restores the peace and Jonathan’s sanity in one fell swoop.
Rosa Mendes, meanwhile, is on the hunt for a new gentleman caller after Summer Rae snatches Cleveland Browns player Gary Barnidge out from under her nose. Problem is, all of Rosa’s potential suitors are either super-conservative or beefy bros just looking for a good time. For Rosa, who craves a connection, this will not do and she rolls the dice on female companionship instead. Natalya fears that Rosa’s increasing desperation to find someone will eventually lead to a lapse in her recovery, and she eventually talks the lovesick señorita down to the point of rationality by episode’s end.
And how about this: Brie Bella beats Daniel Bryan! Granted, it’s in an argument, but still: The “Yes!” Man’s somewhat overbearing monitoring of “Braniel’s” joint bank account means Brie has to go through Nikki to buy a vintage Dolce & Gabbana dress for a red carpet appearance, lest Bryan see the charge and start tearing his beard out in frustration. Ultimately, Brie comes clean about her roundabout purchase right before the event. Afterward, Bryan — typically the voice of reason — relents and admits he should probably ease up on the money worries and yes, the dress was fantastic. Dude, we already knew that.
As for Natalya and Tyson Kidd? No development there just yet, but wait ’til Part 2 …
So before we get to our first potential breakup in “Total Divas” history (no, JoJo and Justin Gabriel doesn't count), let’s cover the other happenings in the Divas division.
First off, Cameron and Vinny decide to use Nikki Bella as their real estate agent to help them purchase a house. After a rough start, the Divas find a home that’d be perfect for the young couple, but the only way they could afford it is if Nikki doesn’t take her commission. She politely shoots down that suggestion, but missteps when she inadvertently insults Vinny’s job, and Cameron summarily severs the business partnership. They manage to remain friends despite everything, though.
Eva Marie is still eagerly anticipating her wedding, despite the fact that her father’s health seems to be in decline. His mood is still positive, though, and therefore so is Eva. Brie and Jonathan’s suggestion that Eva has chosen to deal with her dad’s illness by denying it’s happening is met with swift, profane resistance. But Brie mends the fences by throwing Eva a surprise bridal shower with the Divas and Eva’s mother and friends. When the discussion of her father’s health arises, Mama Marie reassures Eva that, while she doesn’t have to be wallowing in sorrow, her father would appreciate a phone call every now and then.
Finally, we get to it: Natalya and Tyson Kidd’s discord has grown so severe that they seem to be actively contemplating the idea of a divorce. It’s Tyson who cracks the code that his luggish behavior causes Natalya to flip out on him, which leads to bigger and bigger fights. So he decides to remedy the situation by moving out. Natalya’s relieved that she can at least get some peace for the time being, but her reprieve is short-lived when she runs into Kidd backstage at a show and blows a gasket in front of their fellow Superstars and Divas. Even Jimmy Uso is speechless, and that’s when you know it’s bad.
The midseason finale of E!’s “Total Divas” airs next Sunday at 9/8 CT on E!.