In a red-hot Snit
Pop question: Which WWE Superstar has gone the longest without having his shoulders pinned to the mat?
If you're thinking about any of the current champions on Raw, SmackDown or ECW, guess again. Randy Orton, Jeff Hardy, Batista, MVP and CM Punk have all been pinned at some point in the last seven months. So have legends such as Undertaker and those who bill themselves as the "future of sports-entertainment," Mr. Kennedy.
The Superstar in question resembles an ogre. He has lumps on his pasty dome. And his teeth -- well, let's just say that although Dr. Isaac Yankem, DDS hung up his drill a long time ago, he might relish the opportunity to get an opportunity at those yellow-stained molars and bicuspids. This monster, known simply as Snitsky, will never win any beauty contests. But he has won matches and has yet to be pinned in 2007, making him the hottest Superstar in WWE all year.
But you'd never know it on Monday nights. Since being drafted from ECW to Raw last June, Snitsky has been mostly MIA and terrorized mostly up-and-comers on Heat, seen exclusively on WWE.com. When Snitsky served as a substitute for Carlito in his match last Monday, it was his first appearance on Raw in two-and-a-half months.
And why is that? Why can't Snitsky find an opponent? Is the upper echelon of WWE Superstars scared of him? Snitsky has admitted -- with unsettling serenity -- that he takes great pleasure in inflicting pain. Misery is this Nesquehoning, Penn., nightmare's mistress. And he did sideline the ultra-tough, respected veteran Hardcore Holly for months with an arm injury. (WATCH: Snitsky's confessions and path of destruction)
Perhaps most disturbing of all is Snitsky's lack of allegiances. He is apparently an equal opportunity ass-kicker. Carlito thought he had a big, new hired gun when he had Snitsky fight in his match. Snitsky made the Caribbean Superstar swallow his apple the hard way with one swift kick to the face.
So, with his attack on Carlito, has Snitsky scared off more opponents? Or will someone step up to the plate? This snaggle-toothed monster has yet to be truly tested and it will be interesting to see if he loves taking as much pain as he gives. Stay tuned.