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Can you do the Fandango? Who (or what) is WWE's latest Superstar?
We saw a little silhouette of a man Monday on Raw when a spangly vignette heralded the coming of “Fandango,” what appeared to be a Fabulous, Angelic, Noble, Dapper, Astonishing, Naughty, Graceful, Outstanding new Superstar set to take WWE by seductive storm in the coming weeks. Since the WWE Universe was not permitted a glimpse at the man’s (no doubt stunning) visage, however, WWE.com offers up a few theories as to who (or what) the mysterious Fandango may be.
An international spy
Yeah, sure, James Bond doesn’t exactly have a foxtrot number playing whenever he walks in the room, but 007 is the very image of dapper dominance that Fandango seems to be going for. Plus, who says spies can’t cut a rug when the occasion calls for it? (see: Powers, Austin)
An online ticket service for WWE Studios films
Couldn’t get that ticket to “The Day” you were looking for? Fandango could be the answer to that problem, though; the living embodiment of a Mr. Moviefone–type Internet helper who directs the WWE Superstars (and Universe) where to go to catch the latest flicks. Well, that and “Skyfall.” We all want to see “Skyfall.”
Presto change-o, Ryback finds himself pinned by the mighty Fandango! Well, maybe not Ryback, but you catch our drift. A Superstar with command of the magical arts (protégé of Phantasio?) could be a formidable test for some of WWE’s tenured competitors who have come to expect a more conventional style of attack. Personally, we’d love to see someone like this in action against Ricardo Rodriguez. We’re not sure why, but that seems like it’d be a fun one to watch.
A foreign prince
When we think of people who are Fancy, Angelic, Noble, Dapper, etc., some of the first individuals we think of are dignitaries from a foreign land. This new Superstar doesn’t seem to have the slightest hint of an accent. Then again, with the education befitting a man of noble blood, he probably would have learned to suppress it anyway.
Brodus Clay’s dancing instructor
You think big men are born with the gift of boogie like that? Well, maybe some of us here at WWE.com are, but apart from that, it’s tough for the big dogs to get down in the style of The Funkasaurus. Going with the assumption that Brodus’ moves were adapted, not inherent, and since the phrase “You mind if I cut in?” makes us think “dancer,” we propose that Fandango was the architect of The Funkasaurus’ routine. Will he be dancing all over the prone bodies of defeated opponents as well? The WWE Universe can only wait and see.