J.R.'s Superstar of the Week - The Great Khali
Greetings from under the black, 200X Resistol hat from your resident Okie, who is still in search of the perfect BBQ while counting the days until Judgment Day in St. Louis, after a stop in "Flair Country" Monday in Hampton, Va.
This week's Raw Superstar of the Week is a man who's "bigger than Wichita." After consulting with our "royal panel" of King Jerry Lawler, King Booker, The King of Extreme, King Harley Race, Sonny King, Sky King and King the Wonder Dog, this week's winner of nothing tangible is the 7-foot-3-inch, 420-pound Great Khali. He will receive some J.R.'s Beef Jerky for his accomplishments… Or maybe not.
Looking back at Raw from State College, Pa.:
Bobby Lashley is an amazing athlete who lets his actions speak for his words, but Lashley may want to take a second look at his hole card before he steps back in the ring with Mr. McMahon, Shane McMahon and Umaga next Sunday in St. Louis. I have to take my hat off to Lashley for having ample guts.
There is no doubt that Candice Michelle is one of the most improved Divas in WWE as it relates to in-ring performance. Yes, I said in-ring performance -- what else would I be referring to? Even a happily married man like yours truly can still recognize a lovely lady when I see one. I may be a "veteran," but I sure as hell am not dead!
Nonetheless, I am still anxious to see Melina and Mickie James settle their issues once and for all as these two hellcats have developed quite the rivalry. Melina is reportedly upset that Paris Hilton is supposedly going to jail. One reaps what they sow, even rich girls like Hilton, and I hope Paris is put in a cell with "Big Marge" and the authorities call it a day.
Santino Marella, the new and somewhat unlikely Intercontinental Champion, surprised yours truly with his in ring ability last Monday against the rapidly improving Chris Masters. Marella may have been the beneficiary of the "Milan Miracle" a few weeks ago, and I am sure that Mr. McMahon did not intend to select a quasi "ringer" for Umaga to cannibalize on that fateful night. Plus, no one knew Lashley was going to make his presence felt either. Enjoy the ride, Santino, while you can. Titles are won or lost in three seconds, last time I checked.
Maria wears really short skirts and watching her enter and leave the ring is one of my broadcast partner's favorite things about Raw, for the record.
HBK went "big game" hunting last week in a not-so-Happy Valley when he had to face Khali for the No. 1 Contender's slot. Michaels, one of the WWE's all time greats, did everything under his power to win the match, but at the end of the day, the no disqualification match against the giant freak 'o nature was even too much for HBK to handle on Monday night. Khali is obviously not a "refined wrestler," but he is so BIG and so STRONG that even the most elementary of maneuvers become deadly at the hands of the Great Khali.
Cryme Tyme… Mother's Day… what??? Seriously, don't forget the Moms out there on Mother's Day. I sure miss mine.
Interesting times seem to lie ahead for The Hardys on many fronts. Cade and Murdoch pose an intriguing challenge for the World Tag Champs, not to mention the rapidly improving World's Greatest Tag Team. Not to mention that Matt is SmackDown property and Jeff is a Raw Superstar. Are Cade and Murdoch duping all of us with their seemingly legit, new attitude? I am willing to give the Redneck Duo the benefit of the doubt until they prove otherwise.
Carlito has a trip to the Nature Boy's wood shed coming. It's one thing to disrespect Flair when Flair is thousands of miles away Monday night, but for Carlito to "man up" at Torrie Wilson was downright disgusting and flat out stupid. By the way, is there a hotter woman on TV than Torrie?
If there is a bigger opportunist than Edge in this business, I have not met him or her yet. What a week for the native of Ontario! Goading Kennedy into putting the Money in the Bank Contract up on Raw, physically assaulting Kennedy prior to the bell even ringing to signify the start of their match and then picking the bones of the legendary Undertaker on SmackDown after The Demon from Death Valley had endured a physical and bloody steel cage match with Batista, an assault by the World's Strongest Man Mark Henry and then Edge spearing his way to the World Heavyweight Championship. Edge is big-time talented and will be hard pressed to be beat for the World Heavyweight Championship, I can assure you. Edge might be one of the most "obsessed" champions in recent memory, and when cornered those types of athletes are dangerous and resourceful. Not a good week for Undertaker, Mr. Kennedy or Batista, to say the least.
WWE Champion John Cena will be sternly challenged, to say the least, when he defends the title against the Great Khali at Judgment Day. Cena is a smashmouth, slobber-knocker type of a wrestler, which may pay right into Khali's strengths. Can Cena out slug and out fight his much larger opponent, who is known for his striking abilities as much as his freakish size? I am not so sure Cena can apply the STFU to the Punjabi Punisher.
Finally, on a side note, "Stone Cold" Steve Austin is working on his sprawling ranch in South Texas for a few days and is excited about his new abode. The star of The Condemned loves to hunt and he has purchased some prime hunting land that I am anxious to check out. With our BBQ Restaurant opening in Norman, Okla., around June 27, I am sure I will see Steve "Sooner" than later. Many fans that check out www.jrsbarabq.com have provided us with some glowing reviews of The Condemned, which I strongly recommend you see if given the opportunity. I have seen it twice if you are keeping score at home.
See you in Hampton, Va., this Monday for Raw! Take care.