J.R.'s Superstar of the Week - John Cena
Greetings from under the 200X, black Resistol hat from WWE's resident barbecue lover, who is still reeling from the Oklahoma Sooners' upset loss at Colorado, and closer to home, the loss of now-former WWE Champion John Cena due to a torn pectoral muscle tendon that may sideline him for up to one year.
History will be made this Sunday in Chicago at No Mercy when a new WWE Champion will be crowned. But the larger question looming will be who will be in the main event? Randy Orton had earned the distinction of challenging Cena and should obviously be a participant, one would assume. But who would face Orton? Will there be one opponent selected or will this match turn into a contest with multiple participants, such as a Triple Threat Match or a Fatal Four Way Match?
In any event, this is a terrible break for WWE, as Cena was the hottest Superstar in the company and was selling more tickets than anyone and more merchandise as well. The workhorse was also one of the most dedicated athletes to ever be WWE Champion, and Cena's work ethic and grueling schedule representing WWE was astonishing.
Even though some defiant fans were not Cena boosters, no one, unless they are "pet coon goofy," can dispute the fact that he was a tireless, smashmouth wrestler who gave his maximum effort every single time he stepped into the ring. When it comes to work ethic and dedication to the business, few men who have worn WWE gold have ever equaled Cena. Of course, to some fans, that is not important or enough. What's important to the defiant individuals is for them to draw attention to themselves by being "cool" and anti-establishment just for the hell of it. I suppose it is to each his own.
So, because I can, and without the advice of our weekly guest panel, my choice for Raw Superstar of the Week is John Cena. John will receive some sauces and healthy beef jerky from www.jrsbarbq.com, which I guarantee will make him feel better.
Indeed, Umaga looked pretty devastating beating up three ham and eggers in Cleveland on Monday night. I don't know who the victims were, but I would suggest that none of them are vegans.
The Six-Man Tag Team Match featuring the teams of Jeff Hardy, Paul London & Brian Kendrick vs. Shelton Benjamin, Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch was one of the better matches of the entire night, but it ended too abruptly for me (much akin to my prom date my sophomore year in high school). These six athletes are all being counted on to contribute at a higher level on Raw. But unfortunately, their match ended about as quickly as the recent Danny Bonaduce-Johnny Fairplay impromptu tussle in Los Angeles. Bummer.
Speaking of L.A., my congratulations to Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson for his recent success in his latest film, The Game Plan, which was No. 1 at the box office its first weekend. The Great One deserves all the success that comes his way. Mrs. J.R., my wife Jan, and her sister saw the film on opening day last Friday while yours truly was flying to Denver. They loved it, so it gets an official "J.R." endorsement.
Staying in the world of film, "Stone Cold" Steve Austin's DVD, The Condemned, is red-hot as well and selling like crazy; it is the No. 1 selling action-adventure DVD in the land. This is another must-see movie and one I have added to my DVDs of John Wayne and company.
William Regal is back as the General Manager of Monday Night Raw. Jonathan Coachman is still licking his wounds from the Cena assault two weeks ago, but one has to wonder if Coachman still has aspirations to ascend to the top of the food chain within Monday Night Raw hierarchy. I have a feeling this story of wrestling politics isn't over.
Speaking of Regal, his job as Mr. Nanny with Hornswoggle McMahon Monday night was less than stellar. The newest McMahon is a handful, to say the least. But at least we know that "Horny" has Mr. McMahon genes and likes women. I wonder if we will ever hear Hornswoggle speak?
Yeah, Randy Orton was in Chicago Monday night alright -- about the same as I will be cheering for the Texas Longhorns this Saturday in the Cotton Bowl when UT plays Oklahoma. That whole interview had to be an inside job, it would seem to me. Are you telling me that no one in management within WWE didn't know where the interview was being conducted? Right … and Britney Spears is often confused with June Cleaver as the "Mother of the Year."
This just in: The Highlanders want the World Tag Team Titles and nothing else. This may come as a shocking revelation, but perhaps someone should inform Rory and his cousin Robbie that title opportunities have to be earned -- or at least that's the way it should be. These two men do not have fellow Scot "Rowdy" Roddy Piper's endorsement, as best I know.
Cody Rhodes has demonstrated guts and determination in his quest to earn respect from Hardcore Holly, who truly enjoys imposing his will on young wrestlers (sounds like an omitted scene from Oz). My suggestion to Cody is to steer the course, because now, turning away from the obstacle that Holly has placed before the son of the American Dream is one that must be overcome, no matter the cost.
I have the utmost respect for Women's Champion Candice Michelle, and I love her work ethic and desire to be the best. As a matter of fact, Candice reminds me of the amazing Trish Stratus with how hard she works in her quest for perfection and to be the best Diva in the business. However, Beth Phoenix presents a challenge one cannot prepare for because no one on the WWE roster -- no female, that is -- compares to the Glamazon. It might be a long, disappointing night for the lovely Candice at No Mercy this Sunday in Chicago.
I would suggest that after the past two weeks of being manipulated by the Chairman that Triple H is adequately P.O.'ed at the world, and should be at his aggressive best come No Mercy when he fights Umaga. But … could The Game figure into the WWE Title picture Sunday night in John Cena's absence? What about Umaga? How about the reigning Intercontinental Champion Jeff Hardy? The powers that be have a big task ahead of them in addressing the main event at No Mercy.
Does any one find Santino Marella annoying? That noise you heard Monday night during "Marella at the Movies" was the deceased film critic Gene Siskel spinning in his grave. Someday Marella is going to personally encounter "Stone Cold," and my instincts tell me that will be "a bad" for Santino.
Val Venis should get that voice checked.
The Mickie James vs. Melina match was a quickie in wrestling vernacular, as this one was over before Jerry "The King" Lawler could adequately fantasize thanks to -- guess who --another appearance of young Hornswoggle "Horny" McMahon. Maybe Horny's rich father could simply purchase the newly minted McMahon the Bunny Ranch in Nevada, and call it a day. Hornswoggle needs to be careful when dealing with the ladies in the workplace, or he could meet the fate of New York Knicks coach Isiah Thomas, and get slapped with a multi-million dollar sexual harassment judgment. Ouch!
It will be interesting to see who, at the end of the day, takes the credit for injuring John Cena. Will it be Mr. Kennedy, who was Cena's last opponent, or will it be Randy Orton, who gave Cena a cheap shot on the unyielding announcers' table? Could Kennedy find himself in the main event Sunday at No Mercy for the WWE Title? Interesting days do lie ahead.
"The King" and I enjoyed being invited to the Cleveland Indians official pep rally this past Monday afternoon by our friend and Indians designated hitter, Travis Hafner. I personally appreciate the hospitality of the folks in Cleveland and from the Indians organization. The Indians take on the New York Yankees in the American League playoffs. Travis, an avid OU fan, wears #48 for the Tribe and can hit the ball a country mile. Plus, he is a HUGE WWE fan.
Yours truly will be heading to Dallas this week to enjoy, hopefully, the OU-Texas Red River Shootout to be held at the historic Cotton Bowl and airing on ABC. If you see a "stocky" man wearing a black hat on the Sooner sideline that might be your BBQ-lovin' pal. If he looks like he just ate a Texas State Fair corndog, then you will know it's me.
See you in Chicago this Sunday for No Mercy.
Be sure to check out J.R.'s Family Bar-B-Q Restaurant at www.jrsbarbq.com.