J.R.'s Superstar of the Week - Jerry "The King" Lawler

J.R.'s Superstar of the Week - Jerry "The King" Lawler

Greetings from under the black, 200X Resistol hat from the WWE's resident Oklahoman, who will be west coast bound this weekend and looking forward to being a part of The Great American Bash MANY years after broadcasting my first Bash.
The Great American Bash extravaganzas started in 1985 with a huge event held outdoors at the Charlotte Memorial Stadium in Charlotte, N.C. The event continued uninterrupted through 1992 and then took a three-year hiatus before returning in 1995. I broadcasted my first Bash in the late ‘80s, and had several under my belt before I joined WWE in 1993. For those earning a living in NWA/WCW back in the day, The Great American Bash was their equivalent to the WWE's SummerSlam. This Sunday in San Jose, Calif., will be a reunion of sorts for yours truly and this longstanding event, which features some unique matchups to say the least.
This week's guest panel includes such luminaries as The Bruiser, The Cruiser, The Spoiler, The Stomper, The Assassins, The Masked Medics, The Infernos, and The Super Destroyers 1 & 2.  After consultation with them, which wasn't easy by the way, I have made a decision. This week's Raw Superstar of the Week is … WWE Hall of Famer Jerry "The King" Lawler!
"King" stood up admirably to King Booker Monday night in Corpus Christi, much to the delight of the sold-out crowd. My broadcast partner, who has wrestled and defeated some of the biggest names in all of the wrestling business over his illustrious career, was not going to be intimidated or humiliated by the Lennox Lewis-sounding "King Book-Ah." My congrats to the King of Memphis wrestling and my longtime broadcast partner, who will receive some of his favorite things -- J.R.'s Beef Jerky and some Original BBQ Sauce along with, of course, lovely parting gifts, including an autographed photo of King's role model, Hugh Hefner.
Jeff Hardy is not only the "Rainbow-Haired Warrior," but he is, more importantly, the No. 1 contender for the Intercontinental Championship and will face Umaga this Sunday at The Bash. Do you think Umaga knows the way to San Jose? I thought so, too. I just hope Jeff isn't allegedly treated like one of dogs found in Atlanta Falcons Quarterback Michael Vick's home at The Bash. How pathetic is that controversy -- or as Ron Simmons would say, "DAMN!"
William Regal, who indeed does sport a handsome head of hair, looked impressive to me Monday night, and I expect that Regal, who seems more at home on Monday Night Raw, will begin to turn heads over the next few weeks. Sources say that Regal is David Beckham's favorite WWE Superstar, and we all know how reliable "sources say" is, do we not? Yes, I said "Motherland" when referring to Regal's home country Monday night. Is that so wrong?!
I am having a hard time feeling any empathy for Santino Marella because when he loses, he then finds himself in the arms of Maria. If I were Marella, I might try and go on an extended losing streak just for the hell of it.
First of all, Snitsky is in dire need of a teeth cleaning, but it would take a power washer to handle the task. Secondly, does a rather large and somewhat gruesome-looking man saying that "pain is my pleasure" creep you out, too? Snitsky makes Phil Spector look somewhat normal. Notice I said somewhat.
I'm not saying that Randy Orton is the "Paris Hilton of the WWE," but the third-generation Superstar does think he is "hot." The talented RKO specialist has quite the list of legendary victims and could add another bounty to his belt this Sunday when he faces Dusty Rhodes in a Texas Bull Rope Match. "American Dream" fans better hope this one is over early, no matter the outcome. Dusty is a man of convictions and pride, but let's face it, the WWE Hall of Famer realistically has no business in the ring with Orton this Sunday, especially with Master Orton looking to "make a statement." Perhaps Rhodes can channel John Wayne's famous Rooster Cogburn character from the movie True Grit and ride to an unlikely victory one more time in a match the Dream perfected.
Cody Rhodes has a wonderful upside, but Orton exploited the young man's inexperience Monday night. I think acting Raw GM Jonathan Coachman may have allowed Cody to be "picked too green" by allowing the former two-time Georgia state high school wrestling champion to get in the ring with Orton. Nonetheless, Cody Rhodes is a blue chipper and one of the brighter prospects the WWE has introduced in quite some time. But is he ready for prime-time?
Mickie James, one of my personal favorites, vs. Melina Monday night did NOT resemble an audition for the upcoming Sex and the City flick. Melina is a Jezebel who "needs" the WWE Women's Championship sort of like Lindsay Lohan used to need a cocktail. Nonetheless, Candice Michelle is a tough young lady who seemingly has no fear of her biggest rival or of losing the Women's Championship. The brains behind J.R.'s Family Bar-B-Q Restaurant, my lovely wife Jan, thinks Candice will prevail Sunday, but I am not so sure -- not that I don't usually agree with my bride on all matters of importance like most husbands. 
How does Hacksaw Jim Duggan get his trusty 2-by-4 through airport security? If the Transportation Security Administration is collecting tiny Bic lighters from passengers, how do they miss a 2-by-4??
There is no doubt that Sandman is swinging his stick much better than a seemingly frustrated Barry Bonds is these days. Just ask Carlito. Back to Bonds, "Mr. Personality" will no doubt break "Hammerin'" Hank Aaron's career home run record in Major League Baseball, and I think that MLB Commissioner Bud Selig should be on hand. This matter is way too over-analyzed, much like many other subjects that are worn out on ESPN, etc. Speaking of ESPN, they recently made the results of the WSOP (World Series of Poker) known, which did not please me. I wanted to be surprised, as I love watching this event on TV. Nonetheless, I will still watch the card game, which doesn't always endear me in my household.
For the record and for those of you keeping score at home, or at "the house," as "Stone Cold" would say, Mr. Kennedy officially beat up Super Crazy in Corpus Christi for the second week in a row. If you had Crazy in your fantasy pool, you lost. I feel bad for Kennedy being born without a first name. That's sadder than publicist trying to promote the newly escaped Taylor Hicks autobiography. That's what I said too, "Taylor who?" 
The Cena-Lashley face-off Monday night wasn't exactly Meet the Press, but it certainly illustrated that this Sunday's main event heads into The Great American Bash with plenty of P & V (piss and vinegar). I will be interested to see how the fans in San Jose react to the combatants and to see who gets cheered and who gets jeered. The crowd won't affect the outcome, but it will be an interesting atmosphere in a city that can be really hot for its wrestling. By and large, two fan-favorites meeting for the WWE Championship poses some potentially intriguing mat moments this Sunday on pay-per-view. 
I hope you enjoy The Great American Bash this Sunday! Does any one know of a good place for BBQ in San Jose??



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