"Weave" of the future?
What seemed like science fiction a few years ago is en vogue fact today. Recent breakthroughs in nanotechnology -- the science of building machines at a subatomic level -- is fashioning innovations in style. A Georgia Tech research team recently announced the development of clothing that can create an electrical charge through the wearer's body motions. This would enable garment pockets to actually power personal gadgets, like a cell phone or MP3 player.
But why stop there? Today, shoppers can find clothing that utilize nano-developed, microscopic bristled threads to repel stains and liquid. Future nano-improvements could include garments that custom-fit themselves to the wearer, or shirts and ties that can electronically confirm that they match each other color-wise -- great for color-blind businessmen.
So when WWE.com caught up with our Superstars and asked what sorts of features they'd like to see in their attire, some wished "smart clothing" could handle common, some even might say mundane, chores -- particularly when Man's Best Friend is concerned.
"I'd have [the clothes] walk my dog in the wintertime," Mr. Kennedy suggested. "It's so cold where I live …. That's the worst part of my day, getting bundled up to walk my dog."
ECW's Kofi Kingston wishes his clothing could help more around the house. "I'd probably have it do my laundry. I always put off my laundry to the last minute," the Jamaican Superstar said. "Or I could have it do my dishes."
What new Playboy cover model Maria wants in her outfits is the ability to pack themselves in her suitcases. "If [the smart clothes] could pack for me, I'd buy them in a second. [Superstars] pack and unpack so much. Today's pack job was really bad. I don't even think I have underwear. So currently, I'm not wearing any."
Intercontinental Champion Chris Jericho shared his own "stimulating" thoughts on nano-powered undergarments. "You want to make some nanotechnology, make some nanotechnology underwear," Y2J exclaimed. "Let's get everything working the way it should be working … and on time!"
However, not all Superstars are for the idea of micro-machines helping out -- at least, not without their own personal perfection infused.
"I'm genetically perfect. I don't think there are any improvements to be made," explained United States Champion MVP. "I don't think nanotechnology could help me, but I could probably help nanotechnology. If they could take some of my DNA and put it in those microscopic robots, it would make their efficiency a hundred times greater."
Shelton Benjamin is also hesitant to greenlight nanotechnology, though ECW's "Gold Standard" wouldn't refuse at least some assistance in "mane"-taining his gold dome.
"I'd want [nanotechnology] to keep my hair blonde. I do it, but it's an annoying task," Benjamin said. "But the last thing I need is some microscopic little nanomachine doing something I can do for myself."
Matt Striker concurs, believing that nanomachine development is further evidence of how badly societal standards are in decline.
"I would like [nanomachines] to recover the common sense in this society," Striker lectured. "Anyone who needs a chip in their shirt to teach them to turn on their car or find their wallet…you already have that technology; it's called your brain! You were born with it. At least some people were born with it; mine, of course, is much bigger than yours or anyone else's."
Mickie James more than echoes Benjamin and Striker's sentiments. "Are we really getting that lazy to where we need something or someone else to do something for us?" she asked. "This is why half the world is overweight. Now we're going to get our clothes to do stuff for us? Are we serious?"
The very thought of having her clothes inform her that they need washed only further exasperates the former Women's Champion.
"I walk into the grocery store and my clothes tell me ‘you stink'? ... I don't need my clothes to tell me that. I know. I just came from the gym," she explained, barely able to fashion a response.
"I'm a rebel. My clothes are not going to tell me what to do. I'll tell them what to do!"