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What the hell, JBL?
UNIONDALE, N.Y. -- As Ricky Ricardo might say, JBL, you've got some 'splainin' to do to.
This past Friday night on SmackDown, JBL interfered in the big tag team main event. Attacking both Batista and Undertaker as they prepared to defeat Mark Henry & The Great Khali, he allowed Henry & Khali to leave The Animal & The Phenom decimated in the middle of the ring.
One can only assume that the combination of his recent disastrous interviews and his poor poll results at Cyber Sunday have sent JBL to his boiling point. According to SmackDown's color commentator, however, the attack was about much more than that.
"It's very simple: I'm retired, not dead," JBL barked after SmackDown. "I'm still a wrestling god, and I'm still the longest reigning champion in SmackDown history. All of these great athletes you see on SmackDown? I held the WWE Title longer than any of them."
What JBL says is the truth, and he doesn't think that anyone should be surprised.
"I've done this my entire life. In high school, I was an All-State football player; in college, I was an All-American," he recalled. "I've been a champion everywhere I've gone; Japan, Europe, WWE, you name it. I'm the last person alive to beat a Von Erich for a title. I am still the same guy. Put me in a tie and a cowboy hat, put a microphone in front of me, I don't care. I am still the same person inside."
So why go after Batista & Undertaker? Why attack them in the middle of a match?
"Have you been watching SmackDown?" he screamed. "Batista and Undertaker want to put their hands on me? Well, that's not fair game. Beating up Michael Cole? Fine, he's probably used to that, he's been getting beat up his whole life. I am still the top dog; no matter if I'm retired, if I walk into the building with a walker … I'm still the number one guy in this business. If these guys want to put their hands on me, they're going to be carried off like cord wood. I will leave bodies laying everywhere."
Unfortunately for the World Heavyweight Champion and The Phenom, JBL says that the mission is only just beginning.
"Batista and Undertaker are not in my league, period," he commanded. "No one in this industry is in my league, and what I did tonight is prove that. If they want to bitch about it, I couldn't care less. I'm going to call the matches and do what I do every single week, but if they put their hands on me again, it will get worse. And it will get worse and worse if they keep doing it. Boys, you can do a lot of things in your life, but touching me is not one of them."