Kennedy ready to clock in at Royal Rumble
To most people, "beating the clock" may sound like a euphemism, or the literal objective of a classic TV game show. For Mr. Kennedy, it's his window of opportunity— a chance to earn his first-ever World Championship Match against Batista at this year's Royal Rumble.
"Do you realize how fast five minutes and seven seconds is?" asked Kennedy, referring to his pace-setting victory over Chris Benoit during SmackDown's Beat the Clock Sprint. "For anyone to beat that time is going to be next to impossible."
Kennedy may be right; defeating someone as established as the Rabid Wolverine in so short a time span — albeit with the help of an exposed turnbuckle — is an achievement worth bragging about. In fact, to put the speed of Kennedy's victory in everyday terms, five minutes and change could be used to do the following:
1) Watch one-twelfth of 60 Minutes;
2) Make five bowls of Minute Rice;
3) Use the bathroom (depending on which number);
4) Listen to all the good lyrics in Justin Timberlake's FutureSex/LoveSounds;
5) Romance yourself.
No one understands the statement made by Kennedy's five-minute, seven-second mark better than him; for once, however, he's choosing to stay silent about its significance.
"For me to tell you what I bring to the table if — when — I face Batista [in a World Championship Match]... you would have it plastered all over WWE.com, where Batista can read it. That just wouldn't be very smart."
Once again, the old adage proves true: actions speak louder than words. And over the past few months, Kennedy's accomplishments — boosted by an unbelievable upset win over Undertaker in their First Blood Match at Survivor Series last November — have screamed louder than even his amplified self-introductions in the squared circle.
"I've defeated six World Champions...six," he emphasized. "And I can guarantee that Batista will be in for the time of his life [at the Royal Rumble], since nobody's beating my time."
Asked how he can ensure none of the Beat the Clock Sprint's remaining competitors — Finlay, Matt Hardy, MVP and Undertaker -- will best his time at this Friday's edition of SmackDown, an annoyed Kennedy shoots a look that would stop any clock. "I would never do anything to keep my time on top," he said, clearly insulted by the insinuating question. "I don't have to."
That said, Mr. Kennedy's past actions haven't given WWE fans reason to take him at face value now. To truly determine whether or not this rising SmackDown Superstar has ventured into the unknown territory of playing it fair and square, WWE fans can set their watches for 8/9 CT tonight and watch SmackDown's final Beat the Clock Sprint matches on the CW Network.