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Following The Miz
Following The Miz
Jan. 28, 2007
The is true story of when The Miz welcomed WWE.com to his reality on the day of the Royal Rumble, where he attempted become the main event at WrestleMania 23 in Detroit. His only obstacle: tossing 29 other "ninnies" over the top rope. "Hoorah …"
9:45 a.m. was the agreed time for The Miz to began his all-day diary with WWE.com. When he didn't show up in the hotel lobby by 10 a.m., WWE.com called his room and cell phone repeatedly. … No answer. By using tactics that WWE.com or WWE does not condone, we were able to solicit a key for his room from the clerk at the front desk.
Some Superstars choose to prepare for big matches by training, meditating or watching film; The Miz chooses to throw a party in his hotel room and pick up a stranger. Apparently forgetting he granted WWE.com access to follow him all day before the Royal Rumble, he asks: "What are you even doing here at this hour?" It was 10:30 a.m.
After taking a few moments to collect himself, he moved a few bottles out of the bed and came to the realization that he had company next to him. Still groggy from his late night, he didn't bother asking her name before tugging at the sheets and telling her, "You gotta get up and get out."
Gallant gentleman, The Miz is not. Without uttering so much as a syllable to his lady friend, he slumped to the door, opened it and pointed towards the hallway. His unidentified companion obviously got the hint.
Famous last words: "I'll call you sometime … and why are you walking funny?" he said to her. After shutting the door, with a cocky shrug, The Miz rhetorically asked, "Seriously, does she think she's worth the effort?"
"Is the car running?" he asked, as he put on his clothes and posed in the mirror. It wasn't, and he made the announcement that "due to the cold weather outside, I won't be entering the car until the temperature is set at 68 … wait, no, 72 degrees. And, of course, some rockin' tunes will be on the radio, I presume."
The car was warm; the radio was "rockin'" but there was still no sign of The Miz. After knocking on his door for a few minutes, he came out and said, "I was wondering when you were coming back up to grab my bags. What took you so long?"
"Damn … look at that ass," said Miz, as he spotted a shapely woman in a tight, white dress showing off her dance moves in the hotel lobby. "I'm going to need another minute before I leave." He spent some time charming her before asking for an impromptu dance lesson. She complemented Miz on his dancing skills and with a mischievous smile he retorted, "I've learned how to thrust my hips quite well over the years."
As fate would have it, the woman in the white dress was a competitor in a dance competition held at the hotel. Miz's ability to "boogey" caught the attention of a female judge who happened to be a WWE fan, and he accepted an invitation to serve as a celebrity guest judge. As he handed out ones and twos for performances, Miz claimed that he is the only perfect 10 in the bunch. The competition abruptly stopped because the female judge was paying too much attention to Miz and not enough attention to the competition.
The Miz's bags were packed inside the running car and the temperature inside was holding steady at 72 degrees -- just like he ordered. But before he entered the car to head to the arena, he was sidetracked yet again. Down the street from the hotel was an adult boutique, which, of course, was like a magnet for the hormonally driven playboy. "You're going to have to wait another second," he said. One could say he "tweaked" out when he saw the lacy lingerie tightly wrapped around the mannequins in the display window.
"Okay, now let's get out --" before he could finish the sentence his phone rang. "Not so fast," he said. "We're going to the Divas photo shoot." WWE.com was holding its first-ever Divas photo shoot within walking distance of the hotel, and that's all Miz needed to procrastinate for a little longer. At the shoot, he interrupted Mickie James and Kristal on more than one occasion. "Ladies, if you want this to be worthwhile, you have to have The Miz in every shot," he boasted. Kristal chuckled at her SmackDown cohort's quips, but Mickie James was visibly annoyed at his overconfidence.
A fan watching the Divas approached Miz for his autograph. "You see how much I'm loved here in San Antonio?" he asked. "God they love me." As he started writing his name on a piece of paper, the fan said, "Good luck tonight in the Rumble Match." Annoyed, Miz stopped writing and dropped his hands to his side. "Don't need any luck, bro; I'm going to win." The fan shot Miz an odd look and replied, "Right, Miz ... sure you are."
"Hey, is the car still running?" he asked again. It wasn't; it was shut off when he decided to go to see the Divas. "Well, it has to be warm. Tell you what, pick me up at The Alamo." At The Alamo, Miz chatted with the security guard. "So, where is The Alamo exactly?" he asked. The perplexed security guard answered, "Look behind you." Miz turned, laughed and said, "No, I meant the rest of it. I don't know what the big deal was about protecting a shack like this?"
"I'm your biggest supporter, Miz," said one fan as Miz tried to leave the grounds of the Alamo. Unfortunately, the fan's Shawn Michaels T-shirt made a different statement. "Oh really?" asked Miz. In disgust, he turned to the camera and asked, "What is this guy doing wearing an HBK shirt if he loves The Miz so much?" Then he turned to the fan and asked "Well … huh? Huh? I hope you lose your ticket to tonight's show."
Most people are looking forward to dinner by 3 p.m., but this is when Miz started thinking about lunch. He spotted a McDonald's up the street. He ordered 12-piece nuggets and a small drink. Maybe his stomach was still queasy from the night before. When he got his order, he started ramming two nuggets together as if they were fighting. As their fried insides mashed together and expelled the oily white meat, he said, "Hmmm ... I wonder if female chicken nuggets have nipples." The thing is, Miz wasn't waiting for a reaction out of anyone. … He was serious.
Heading into the arena, Miz insisted on pulling his own bags. This was a stark contrast to his attitude earlier in the morning when he demanded someone else grab them from his hotel room. Maybe he didn't want his fans in attendance -- or the other Superstars -- to see "the Royal Rumble Match frontrunner" getting pampered by lowly WWE.com reporters. It makes sense. With all three brands involved in the Rumble Match, seeing a youthful, relatively new Superstar being spoiled could paint a bull's eye on The Miz in one of the most important matches of his career.
Miz disappeared for a few hours. When he finally answered our call, he said he could be found in the locker room area. He pulled his gear out of his suitcase as if everything had a correct order. The time before he stepped into the ring with 29 other Superstars to battle it out for a World Championship opportunity was rapidly winding down. In less than two hours, the 2007 Royal Rumble would be underway, and Miz would get his chance to prove just how powerful of a Superstar he'd become since his in-ring debut this past summer.
As he stripped his business casual attire off and stepped into his ring gear, Miz's attitude turned 180 degrees. Gone were the jokes about farts and genitals, and quietly his tone shifted from playful to serious. The air surrounding him was thick with nerves and anxiety as the reality of just how much was at stake began to settle in.
"Nothing to do now but sit and wait until my number gets called," he said with an uneasy smile. Raw ring announcer Lilian Garcia has begun singing "The National Anthem" and The Miz has begun to pace as he breathes loud; in through his nose, out through his mouth.
Somehow getting the favorable number of the 29th person to enter the Royal Rumble Match didn't give Miz any advantages. He only lasted a few seconds before he was launched over the top rope by The Great Khali, ending his hopes of earning the opportunity to main-event WrestleMania 23, and no doubt disappointing all of the Mizfits scattered around the sold-out crowd at the AT&T Center.
"It's over; seriously, get that piece of s*** out of my face," he said as he went ballistic on our WWE.com photographer. Miz found a bare piece of wall and leaned against it as he ran his hands through his hair. He let out a deep sigh, as if he couldn't believe what just happened. Another picture was snapped, which sent Miz into a tirade on the "unprofessional and inconsiderate" antics of WWE.com. With that said, he stormed off and was nowhere to be found for the remainder of the night.
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