The ban backfires

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July 04, 2006

After D-Generation X rigged a prank that dumped a sea of raunchy feces onto Mr. McMahon, his son Shane and all five members of the Spirit Squad last Monday on RAW, The Chairman was bound to stay one step ahead of DX this week by banning Triple H and Shawn Michaels from the arena.  However, his plot to hold the WWE pranksters at bay didn't keep, as HBK and The Game caused as much—if not more—havoc from outside the arena than they could have inside.

Upon their arrival, Jonathan Coachman and a barricade of security personnel informed DX that they were barred from entering the arena and had to leave the premises. With that said, DX did what they normally do—they improvised. A DX sponsored BBQ was thrown outside the area, and with HBK and The Game behind the party, it's not surprising that it attracted more than a few bubbly females, as well as some beer-thirsty dudes looking to snack on a smorgasbord of holiday food, including a D-Generation X-specialty—Mr. McMahon-size cocktail wieners. 

As the party outside raged, Triple H took a break from his grilling duties just as Candice Michelle approached looking to lure The Game into some post-dinner activities. Unfortunately for her, his services were already being rendered by a groupie hiding under the table. The good thing for Candice—not to mention for us viewers—is that groupies don't travel alone, as a second one hiding under the table happened to be in a very giving mood, and Candice certainly seemed to have no problem receiving gifts.

Meanwhile, believing he could finally let his guard down and concentrate on running his company, Mr. McMahon had no idea the type of night he'd be in for. His plan to ban DX backfired horribly, and it began when they seized control of the WWE production truck, successfully taking control of RAW, ruining another Monday night for the Chairman.

Mr. McMahon found out about their discovery the hard way. While using the public restroom facilities, DX activated the camera in the Men's Room, catching the Chairman in the epitome of private moments as he relieved himself and made comments regarding his Andre the Giant sized…‘frankfurter.'

Realizing his boss was again the butt of another DX prank, as the TitanTron displayed the bathroom scene to the fans in attendance and those watching at home, Jonathan Coachman burst in to warn Mr. McMahon. But the Personal Assistant's urgency startled his boss, causing the Chairman to jump and turn towards Coachman, spritzing him with the remainder of his ‘relief.'

Afterwards, as he entered the ring to make the announcement that at Saturday Night's Main Event DX would take on all five members of the Spirit Squad in an Elimination Match, Mr. McMahon's voice sounded askew from his normal growl, ranging as high and child-like as Michael Jackson, to as deep as Darth Vader. A response to Mr. McMahon's Saturday Night Main Event match announcement was made DX-style, with a doodle of a rooster on the screen adjacent to The Chairman's head, reminding viewers of Mr. McMahon's infatuation with cocks.

Looking ragged and defeated after another disaster of a Monday, Mr. McMahon tried to pack it in early and flee the arena. As his stretch limo pulled away, an onslaught of fireworks smoked him out of the limo The Chairman rolled out of the car, his face black with suit and ash, as The Game and HBK stood over him, sparklers in hand, informing Mr. McMahon that he should think again before banning them from an arena.

 The Chairman was the obvious target for the night, but he wasn't he only one who was used for DX's entertainment. As Melina accompanied Johnny Nitro to the ring, her split during his entrance was paused and rerun on the TitanTron, clearly causing a rise for male adolescent viewers, and giving people another reasons to invest in TIVO.

After Nitro's match, Trish Stratus came down the ramp to get a piece of Melina for what she did last week on RAW. But, with DX at the helm, the brawl that ensued between the two Divas took a back seat to Trish's entrance to the ring, which was replayed in slow motion, reminiscent of a youthful Pam Anderson bounding on the beach, bouncing wildly with each stride during her Baywatch intro.

Umaga, feared by many in WWE for his savage-like nature, wasn't exempt from DX's wrath. HBK interrupted Armando Alejandro Estrada's "monotonous speech," finding it to be the perfect time to plug DX's new T-shirt rather than hear what Armando had to say about his Samoan client. Infuriated by their actions, Estrada tried to respond to HBK after Umaga ripped through another opponent, but as Armando tried to speak his voice was dubbed over with loud belches.

Without even stepping foot inside the building, DX left their stamp all over RAW, leaving the Chairman and all the other WWE Superstars to realize that D-Generation X does whatever they want, whenever they want. While their sophomoric stunts and juvenile priorities shined through in their production debut, it's safe to say that on July 15 at Saturday Night's Main Event those activities will take a back seat to the task at hand—defeating the Spirit Squad in the Elimination Match, trying again to prove that DX is at the top of their game.

With only one RAW left before Saturday Night's Main Event, how will the Chairman respond? What's left for him to do to salvage what little control he has left of his company? Expect drastic measure's to be taken this Monday on RAW to punish the twosome that have held Mr. McMahon and WWE in check since reuniting in June.

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