Reversals and razors

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March 19, 2007

With less than two weeks left before the biggest night in sports-entertainment, WWE fans witnessed an exciting WrestleMania Reversal Match, Mr. McMahon making a huge announcement and Eugene getting an unwanted haircut, all live from Indianapolis.

Although both World Tag Team Champions had scheduled WrestleMania Reversal Matches (where they would face one of their partner’s past WrestleMania foes), only WWE Champion John Cena’s opponent was ready to step in the ring. Shawn Michaels arrived prepared to face SmackDown color commentator JBL, who two years ago had battled John Cena at WrestleMania 21. But JBL backed out of the competition, claiming: “If I come out of retirement it will be my choosing, my rules and in my town, New York City.” The Armani-clad Layfield continued, “Deep down, you can’t beat John Cena. You make me sick!”  HBK responded with some devastating Sweet Chin Music that laid JBL out cold.

Meanwhile, Cena, would square off against HBK’s WrestleMania XX opponent, United States Champion Chris Benoit. In an incredible match that stretched Cena’s sheer power and Benoit’s extraordinary technical skills to the limits, the WWE Champion got the upper hand and forced the Rabid Wolverine to tap out to the STFU. Moments after Cena’s victory, guest commentator HBK entered the ring and tuned up the band to prep a kick that sent his partner a clear message: I can take you down anytime I want. Never one to be outdone, The Champ hoisted Michaels up on his shoulders but released him before delivering his trademark FU. These two competitors seem to have each other’s number, and their match at WrestleMania is sure to be nothing short of legendary.  

Mr. McMahon’s night got off to a rough start when Eugene bumped into him, dousing The Chairman with a cold drink. In retaliation, The Chairman scheduled a match pitting Eugene against the Samoan Bulldozer, Umaga. After a thunderous Samoan Spike helped Umaga pick up the three-count, Mr. McMahon had Eugene strapped to a barber’s chair, then proceeded to shave the poor guy’s head while screaming, “This is going to happen to you, Donald Trump!”

In a shocking announcement, The Chairman later set up a match up for next week on Raw:  ECW World Champion Bobby Lashley will face none other than Mr. McMahon himself!

Mr. McMahon was angered when Lashley became the first Superstar to officially break Chris Masters’ powerful Master Lock. After defeating every challenger for over two years, Masters seemed to be in a state of shock after Lashley muscled his way out of the Master Lock Challenge. Mr. McMahon rewarded Trump’s WrestleMania representative with a trip out of the arena courtesy of the WWE security staff. 

The tensions between former World Tag Team Champions Edge & Randy Orton rose to new heights this week. After Edge hung Orton out to dry last week in a match against Bobby Lashley on ECW, Orton arranged for Edge to defend his spot in the Money in the Bank Ladder Match at WrestleMania in a 10-man Battle Royal.

At the beginning of the match, Edge seemed to injure his knee and had to be removed from the contest. In an ironic turn of events, the final two Superstars in the ring ended up being Carlito and Ric Flair. Although Flair has served as almost a mentor to the Southpaw from San Juan, the “Dirtiest Player in the Game" had no problem eliminating the younger man. While Flair celebrated, Edge stepped back into the ring to eliminate him and reclaim his spot in the Money in the Bank Ladder Match. Edge celebrated with a victory dance, leading many to speculate that his “injury” was just a trick to help him win the contest.

Also on Raw, Jeff Hardy defeated fellow Money in the Bank Ladder Match competitor Randy Orton by disqualification. Edge slid a ladder into the ring, and Orton slammed it into Hardy’s midsection drawing the disqualification. Edge then backed away, leaving Orton at the mercy of a vicious leg drop from Hardy off the top of the ladder.

Meanwhile, Women’s Champion Melina defeated Candice Michelle in a Bra and Panties Match, but was quickly disrobed by her WrestleMania opponent, Ashley. After a surprise attack by Melina left Ashley sprawled out in the ring, The Great Khali entered and would have Chokeslammed the Diva had Jerry “The King” Lawler not come to her aid. Unfortunately for Lawler, he received the brunt of Khali’s attack and had to receive medical attention. Khali’s rage of late has been directed at Kane, who he will meet at WrestleMania 23.

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