Ego-maniac?

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May 23, 2007

Recalling every egotistical stunt that maniacal business mogul -- and current ECW World Champion -- Mr. McMahon has ever pulled could take months, possibly years. But the WWE Chairman's latest ego-trip, prompted by the insatiable need to dispirit Bobby Lashley, has forced him into a Street Fight… and a One Night Stand that could well be his last.

What has pushed his billion-dollar brain to get involved in such a dim-witted stunt? It can't be a lust for money; he has enough cash to spend all day, every day for at least 50 years, and still have enough pocket change for two Ferraris, a few dozen cases of Cristal, and a manicure.

It's not a matter of hot-dogging, either. (Billionaires don't eat hot-dogs, anyway.) The man is ECW's World Champion, has main-evented at the Mecca of sports-entertainment, Madison Square Garden, and received his doctorate from Sacred Heart, one of America's most prestigious universities.

So what piece of this puzzle is missing?

In the past, we've watched the Chairman land himself in some extremely uncomfortable situations while trying to maintain his dominance. The list reads like something out of an issue of Mad magazine. There was the nosedive into the depths of Big Show's "vertical smile," having human feces dumped all over him, and the embarrassment of having Donald Trump and Lashley shave his head in front of more than 80,000 fans at WrestleMania 23.

Perhaps our fans more fondly remember the time Mr. McMahon's pants became drenched in his own urine. How about when he was locked in a cage suspended above the ring, or when D-Generation X spray- painted their logo across the face of WWE Headquarters? And who could ever forget the "higher power" that struck the Chairman during a match that was slated to be a 2-on-1 slaughter versus Shawn Michaels?

Call us crazy, but it's possible that the egomaniacal McMahon's common sense got buzzed off along with his hair, and has yet to grow back underneath his Armani skullet. Why else provoke someone as agitated, capable and, let's face it, muscular and tough as Bobby Lashley? The ECW Champion's inflated ego insisted that Lashley run through a gauntlet against four Raw Superstars to earn another title opportunity at One Night Stand. Unfortunately, his foolish pride backfired when the No. 1 contender dismantled all four opponents, thereby catapulting the champion from the penthouse to the "street."

Think about it this way: hair can grow back, cars can be fixed, cages can be unlocked, and feces can be removed. (As for the bird's eye view of Big Show's rear end…well, there's really no getting over that.) However, McMahon's Street Fight with Lashley has so much more at stake than ever before. The point is, while the aforementioned situations were tremendously embarrassing, none of them ever placed the Chairman's life in as much danger as it will be in at One Night Stand.

With a 270-pound powerhouse who's salivating at the opportunity to dismantle his opponent and take back what he considers rightfully his, Mr. McMahon may have no choice but to relinquish the ECW World Title -- along with his ability to eat without feeding tubes.

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