#6: Latino Heat Parking Lot Brawl (Episode 212)
The Wreckoning
Regardless of whether it has aired Thursday nights or, most recently, Friday nights, SmackDown has remained a driving ratings force in its primetime slot (8/7 CT) for nearly eight years. However, inside Birmingham’s BJCC Arena, the show’s 212th broadcast shifted gears with a rivalry that ended not inside a ring, but in a parking garage.
In the weeks building up to September 11, 2003, bad blood had spilled between John Cena and then-United States Champion Eddie Guerrero. After boosting one of Latino Heat’s lowriders (ironic when you consider the car belonged to one whose motto was to “lie, cheat and steal”), the brash “Dr. of Thuganomics” abruptly ended their ensuing match with a low blow and an FU onto a car tire. Disrespected in front of his family and hometown crowd in El Paso, Texas, Eddie issued Cena an anything-goes challenge in Birmingham, Ala., for SmackDown’s first-ever “Latino Heat Parking Lot Brawl.”
Waiting in the arena’s secured garage amid surrounding cars and SmackDown Superstars, Cena—geared for battle in jeans, work boots and a Chicago Bears football jersey—freestyled insults about Eddie’s manhood, versing, I’m gonna rock him so hard, he’ll think my name’s Maivia / I force-feed him gorditas till he explodes from diar-rhea! His tune quickly changed, however, as Eddie—garbed in his “Cheat 2 Win” T-shirt—parked his lowrider truck and immediately went on the offensive.
Witnessing this skirmish was akin to watching The Warriors meets Fight Club at a drive-thru—with the surrounding vehicles and their respective cargo acting as weapons. Cena and Guerrero threw everything at each other but the kitchen sink, and not for lack of trying; they just couldn’t find a kitchen sink handy in a parking lot. Instead, they’d put shovels, safety belts, even a lawnmower to good use, while car hoods, headlights and front windshields fell victim to suplexes, hard Irish whips and the like in their falls-really-do-count-anywhere contest.
After smashing each other’s heads into driver- and passenger-side windows, an exhausted Eddie built some Latino Heat by repeatedly ramming Cena’s face into a steering wheel, then burning his chest with a lit cigarette lighter. Cooling off the Dr. of Thuganomics with one vehicle’s windshield fluid and front wipers, he then hip-tossed him onto the hood of a fire engine-red sportscar. As Eddie climbed an adjacent minivan to Frog Splash his adversary, the sprawled-out Cena started to recover, looking like he might be able to avoid the attack…until Chavo Guerrero came out of nowhere and cracked him across the skull with a hubcap. Eddie’s Frog Splash off the minivan connected, and the ref made the three-count to end what was genuinely a car wreck of a match.
“I got a headache!” was all a victorious-yet-dazed Eddie could muster as Los Guerreros drove the lowrider out of the parking lot, leaving Cena a battered, bloodied casualty of what SmackDown announcer Michael Cole termed as “Guerrero Payback”—and what WWE.com calls its No. 6 Most Memorable SmackDown Moment.